The finished tarts

I found this recipe in Leiths Simple Cookery… I just couldn’t resist a little italian flavoured tart (who could?). They are delicious and quick to make and easy enough even for me (OK I admit I didn’t understand some of it).

I’m starting to really like this book. I reckon I’ll cook some more from there and post the results here…

The ingredients are:

• Puff pastry (1 roll of)
• A blob of Mozzarella
• Cherry tomatoes
• Green Pesto
• A little olive oil
• salt & pepper

Ingrediants

Get your sheet of ready rolled puff pastry, I know it’s cheaper if you roll it yourself. But do I really take the risk?

Get a large mug and cut out some reasonable sized circles from the pastry, then get a smaller mug and push it gently into the middle of your circles (try not to get it all the way through; more of a scoring), this will get the nice raised edged look when the pastry’s cooked. The inner circle needs to be about a centimetre in from the edge.

Put a large teaspoon of pesto (try out the MCC pesto) into the inner ring, cover the tray and put in the fridge. Not entirely sure why this is necessary but there you go  (not the pesto bit; the fridge).

Get you cups out

While your waiting for the “pesto to dry” you can slice up the Mozzarella and tomatoes.

Fifteen minutes after putting the pesto pastry in the fridge take them out, cover the pesto with the mozzarella, tomato slices and drizzle with a little olive oil. Add a pinch of salt and pepper and stick into an oven preheated to 200c.

In twenty five minutes you’ll have some of the loveliest italian tarts you’ve ever tasted. Add a bit of shredded basil on top of the tomato to finish it off.

Getting ready for the oven (see the inner circles)

[note: this was a lonely comment on a test post and now has a comfy post all to itself]

So we decided on burgers, big fat ones. Whenever I’ve made burgers in the past they’ve always fallen apart, but now, aha, I have found the secret…

So, we went for a walk in the rain, picked some wild garlic, got soaking wet, came home, dried off and got on.

The kids love this stuff, getting mucky, wet, picking some stuff to eat, although they ate all their leaves before we got back…

Anyway ere we go, easy peasy lemon squeazy.

• Minced beef, not too lean.
• Handful of wild garlic (finely chopped bulb garlic will do)
• Salt
• Pepper
• An egg

The trick I’ve found with burgers is – do not mix in a bowl. I’m not sure why, but they seem to stay together better, and it’s more fun.

So get the mince out and put on a larger chopping board and flatten out with your hands, fold it over and flatten again, do this for a few minutes.

Next, break the egg over the flattened mince, wishing that your chopping board had a gutter (you’ll see what I mean), you then fold the egg into the meat. When you have kids; the more mess the better!

The egg should be thoroughly folded in and the meat kind of sticky, add some black pepper, a pinch of salt.

Make some patties, we made big fat ones, Harvey’s got tiny hands but still managed to make the biggest. Just make big meat balls, if you want to add something to flavour, this is the time. I ripped up some of the wild garlic and folded it in with the meat and then reformed as a ball, Max added some Nando’s Piri Piri sauce (he likes it hot). If you must add onions (why?) cook them first and chop really fine. Really you should add afterwards in your bun…

Cook under a hot grill for 7-10 minutes each side (depends if you like it rare or not).

Serve with a bap (I love baps) some salad, some fat crispy chips, a sliver of cheese and sauces of your choice.

A top tip for slicing the cheese (I know most of you know this; I’m new you know), use your potato peeler, revelation, after nearly chopping off my fingers.

These burgers are great, but I have to say the star of this show were the chips, I’ve never made chips before and these far exceeded my expectations, and the kids. lol.

For some extra girth, you will need

• 85g pudding rice
• 150ml (1/4 pint) water
• 500ml (1 pint) milk
• 1 teasponn of vanilla essence
• 2 to 3 punches of sugar
• 50g almonds (whole and blanched)
• 300ml (just over 1/2 a pint) whipping cream

You need to be quite precise with these measurements. So investing in scales and a measuring jug would be a good thing. Alternatively, you may know of a “girl” that has “domestic equipment”. Be not afraid of them, they will help you. What’s more, 85g of pudding rice really doesn’t look like much but do not be fooled into adding more. This rice will soon absorb all the liquid.So, to get going, in a pan large enough to hold the ingredients, add the rice, water, milk and sugar and bring to the boil. When bubblation is reached, turn down the heat for some simmeration.

2/. Just simmer it for about 40 minutes or until the rice has absorbed the liquid. Not sloppy either mind, or you will end up with some kind of pudding / soup hybrid. Either way, the pudding needs to be cold for the next bit. With method 1 you will have a cold pudd but with method 2 you must wait.

Do not worry if it looks a bit stodgy, Stodgy at this stage is good, when we add the whipped cream, it will loosen up. Whip the cream in a manly fashion with a whisk, or use an electric version. Get the cream nice and stiff but don’t go to far or you will end up with butter. Next you must gently fold the whipped cream into the rice. Fold?, I hear you ask. The idea is not to mix it to hard. This will just get rid of the air you just beat into it. You just want to combine the rice and cream.

Finally, crush up the almonds keeping one whole one to the side. Best way is to put them in a clear plastic bag and beat them with a rolling pin, or a wooden spoon. You will end up with crushed nuts. Take a while to get your breath back then carry on. Fold your nuts into the pudding gently, including the whole one. Whoever gets the whole almond, wins a prize, usually a car, or a smallish country.

This pudding is traditionally served with a cherry sauce and, there is fierce debate in Denmark as to whether it should be a hot or a cold sauce. How the long winter evenings must fly by. Don’t get involved – use your favourite jam. Cherry, blackberry, raspberry…. whichever you fancy. You can even heat some up and join the debate. Careful you don’t burn your tongue though.

Incidentally, this pudding goes rather well with the following choons: B52′s – “6060-842″, The Clash – “White Man in Hammersmith Palais” and Ian Dury and The Blockheads – “Sweet Gene Vincent”

Also, whilst this may look a touch involved, it is infact fairly simple. Take your time, do each bit in the order that it is written and keep the recipe to hand. The hardest bit is the custard but all you need to remember, is to pour slowly and keep stirring.

here’s what you’ll need…

• 1 Large orange zest
• 50g sultanas
• Grand Marnier/Brandy/Whisky (just one…)
• 200g Brioche
• 150ml milk
• 150ml double cream
• 50g Maya Gold orange spiced chocolate (or just good quality dark chocolate)
• 1 medium egg
• 1 egg yolk
• 50g sugar

Take the zest from the orange using the really small “setting” on the grater. You can get a special tool for the job, which is great but only if you do a lot of zesting. Put half of the zest in a bowl with the sultanas or raisins if you prefer. Pour in a large measure and a splash more of booze. Grand Marnier is great because it has orange essence in it, but Brandy is good and so is Whisky. If you have none of these or refrain from alcohol you could warm them in a pan with water. The idea is to get them nice and plump. If you’re going the boozy way, you can do this bit the day before but a couple of hours is enough.

Next, Brioche. Brioche is a french bread made with butter. It’s quite sweet, so good for a pud, and because there is butter in it, it saves us having to spread it on. The loaf I got was 400g and I used half of it cut into slices a little less than a thumbs width. Then cut those slices in half. Smear the bottom of an ovenproof dish with a finger scoop of butter (or a little oil) and cover the bottom with half the bricoche.This is so it will not stick. Then put half the sultana/booze mix on top, the rest of the Brioche in another layer and finally the rest of the sultanas.

I used a 20cm cake tin which fit the pud perfectly. But it doesn’t have to be a round dish, it can be any dish, as long as it’s ovenproof and about the same size. If you’re not sure, do a dry run with the bread to see how well it fits. So long as half the bread covers the bottom, you’re on to a winner.

As the liquid begins to boil, turn down the heat and add the chocolate, a few chunks at a time, whilst whisking. When it has all been mixed in, slowly add the chocolte milk to the pale and frothy egg mix, whisking all the time. If you can get someone to help here, it would be a bonus. One pour slowly, one whisk fast. If not, just take your time. When you’ve combined the lot pour it over the Brioche, fill all the litlle gaps and don’t forget the top. Now just leave it on the side for t least 15 minutes, preferably longer. You want the bread to soak up all the liquid.

Yeh, it freaks me out too…

A quote from the article:

“As is evident from the formula, the boiling time depends on the size of the egg. For a larger egg, a longer cooking time is needed. The circumference of the egg is easily measured around the thick end using a piece of string which, after marking of the circumference of the egg, can be measured using a ruler. I have prepared a piece of string which I keep in the kitchen with three knots at 13, 14 and 15 cm respectively to make it even simpler.”

Ok then.

I decided that all I wanted was a pie. Me and Gee had a game pie from a farmers market and frankly it was rank, but we both couldn’t help but fantasize over pies. So the mission the next day was to research steak and kidney pies on this interweb thingy. I found hundreds of recipes, read about thirty and realised that there were a few quantities and ingredients that are pretty consistent and a few extras here and there that seem worthy of additional investigation.

So I ended up with the following ingredients.

• 1.5 lbs of Beef cut into large cubes
• 1/2 lb of kidney, cleaned, cut into small chunks, with all tubing cut out
• 20-30 Button mushrooms cut in half
• Puff Pastry, you could make your own, but the packet stuff is pretty good
• 1 Bay leaf
• 1 large onion, finely chopped
• 1 clove of garlic, sliced
• Worcester sauce
• Salt and pepper
• Punch of flour
• Couple of knobs of butter
• Beef stock, I bought mine from Sainsbury’s
• 1 egg

Doesn’t look enough once you write it down…

First things first, chop your steak into nice big chunks, I like each chunk to be two bites, but each to their own… The kidney needs to be washed and the “skin” needs to be peeled off. You also need to get the white tubey bits out from the middle, this was the longest part of the prepping. Luckily my local butcher did most of this for me, except the nasty tube bit.

Heat up a deep frying pan and chuck in a good size knob of butter, wait for it to melt and add the onion, we want them to go a nice golden colour, then add in the garlic slivers. Add a good few pinches of salt and pepper.

Then add the steak and kidney, let it get browned all over and add a dash of Worcester sauce. Once browned add in the stock and the bay leaf and leave for an hour or so simmering with a lid on. It doesn’t need to be exactly an hour, so go and watch 2 episodes of your favourite tv programme, or take the dog for a walk.

Once back add in the mushrooms, a bit more salt and pepper and another dash of Worcester sauce, and leave to simmer again for 20 minutes (with the lid on).
Now we need to thicken up the gravy. Someone told me to make a Rue, which is where you make a paste out of flour and butter. I’m not quite sure of the benefits of this method but it definitely works. This is probably the trickiest part of the whole recipe, but really is pretty simple. I seemed to make too much, but no matter. Get a knob of butter half the size of your thumb and add flour to it and rub the flour into the butter with the back of a spoon, when it turns into a lumpy paste it’s ready.

Stir the rue into the pan, making sure that you dissolve the lumps properly. You will notice the gravy change colour, getting lighter and slowly thickening up. Don’t make it too thick, if you do add a little more stock and stir that in.

Right we’re ready, the oven should be on (oops forgot to say), to the temperature that the pastry states on the packet(!!). Pour the steak and kidney and gravy into a oven proof dish and lay the pastry over the top. Push the edges of the pastry down a bit, and brush the top of the pastry with a whisked up egg, I made a few air holes too, to let the steam out.

Put this in the oven, and take out when the packet tells you to…

I have to say I’m amazed at how easy and impressive it is to make this. When I made it I actually forgot to make anything else to go with it, which is fine by be. I forget others like vegetables…

Anyway the ingredients for the MCC Carbonara are as follows

• 2 medium sized onions, diced
• 24 bits of streaky bacon, cut into strips
• About 13 medium sized button mushrooms, sliced
• 2 bags(1000g) of multi grain tagliatelle
• 500 ml of Creme Fraiche
• Parmesan, about the size of four fingers, grated!!!
• Salt and Pepper
• 4 Eggs
• Olive oil

First we fry off the bacon bits, in a splash of olive oil. We want to get rid of any water in the bacon and get it to be just about crispy. Once “crisped” we take out the bacon and chuck the onions into the same pan (to give them flavour), turn up the heat and add a bit more oil and some salt and pepper. We’re not trying to sweat the onions, just cook them off a bit. Once they look like they’re just starting to brown add the bacon back to the pan with the mushrooms and give a good stir in.

Whilst this is simmering for a minute, put the water on for the pasta and separate the yolks out from the eggs.

Add the creme fraiche to the onion, bacon and mushrooms and turn the heat down to low. Let the flavours familiarise for 10 minutes, give a stir here and there.

If the pasta is dried, read the packet for instructions, if like you used fresh, cook it for 3-4 minutes. I was a bit sceptical at first about the whole grain stuff, but it actually turned out to be a top choice.

So we’ve cooked the pasta and we now, put it into a big bowl, along with the mixture from the frying pan, add the grated parmesan and egg yolks and mix up thoroughly. Serve up and that’s it.

This amount of ingredients was actually enough for about 5 of us. Using the creme fresh instead of cream makes it a little less rich and much better for the people who want to live longer…

Find below the ultimate Mayo recipe as written by the girlfriends dad, he’s mentioned it to me before and I’ve even tasted it a fair few times, but the other day, Nick, finally reckons that he’s mastered it and offered up the recipe, it turns out we make masochistic Mayo, see what you think…

MAYONNAISE

Mayonnaise has nothing to do with Mayonne in France, but comes from a corruption of Mahon capital of Minorca.

As is usual, the food is produced from what the local house-wife has had to hand over the years. It has been internationalised, and corrupted, ever since.

Traditionally whisked by hand, this version uses the modern kitchen convenience of a food processor. Those who have time to spare and are of a masochistic bent may like to follow the ‘correct’ method given after the the ‘cheats’ version .

Ingredients

• EGG -any egg will do- small, medium or large- quail to ostrich. The larger the egg the greater shading upwards of the dry ingredients has to be.; i.e. A very small hen’s egg will need approx. ¼ teaspoon less mustard than a very large hen’s egg. Try to use a room-temperature egg.
• MUSTARD- Dry Coleman’s powder is best; fancy French mixes are all very well but usually come with flavours you don’t want, too little solid matter and too much vinegar. If you are reduced to using a pre-mixed mustard, be very careful about adding more vinegar and nearly double the tea-spoon rate( all in all- avoid).
• PEPPER- as always, freshly milled. Black, white(hot, no taste) or three pepper mixes, it matters not.
• SALT- anything in the cupboard marked ‘Salt’.
• SUGAR- anything in the cupboard marked ‘Sugar’. Icing sugar might be tricky as it could congeal, brown sugar may stain the finished sauce an unwanted colour; but ,Hey! We all need a little sweetness.
• OLIVE OIL- There are whole libraries dedicated to books and treatises on which olive oil you should use for what purpose, just pick up the nearest bottle to hand that has enough in it. E.V.O.O. Has the distinctive nutty/oily taste, Sainsbury’s cheapest gives a lighter, less pervasive, less intrusive finish; mix and match as you like and by all means use any other good quality oil such as sunflower, grape seed, etc. I would avoid sump oil or used chip oil, though.
• VINEGAR- Try to use white wine, sherry or cider vinegar. Other vinegars will work but may impart flavours you don’t want. Try not to use malt vinegar or spirit vinegar, these are boring.
• WATER- out of the tap, hot or cold.

METHOD

Assemble clean food processor and plug in. DO NOT SWITCH ON AT THE WALL

1. With the lid off, crack your egg on the side and prise apart allowing the yolk and white to fall into the machine. Retrieve the broken shell bits that fell in with a spoon, a fork or a knife. NOW YOU CAN SWITCH IT ON.
2. Add 1 ½ teaspoons of mustard, ¼ teaspoon pepper, ¼ teaspoon salt and 2 teaspoons sugar.
3. Whizz. Stop. Make sure all ingredients are off the side of the mixing vessel and whizz again.
4. Take the oil and, while the machine is running, DRIP and I mean DRIP oil into the mix. 1 drip a second to begin with, gradually increasing to a very thin string of oil. Give the mix little rests from oil as you go but keep it wizzing. This process should take about 2 minutes to get to the ‘string’ stage. ( Here’s the science: what you are trying to do is against nature. You are trying to persuade oil and water to mix. Without ultra-sound or heat this is tricky, so you make it easier by introducing a very finely divided matrix which absorbs some water, the mustard powder, and which allows the oil to form an emulsion with the powder/ water mix. Adding oil too fast over loads the equation and stability is lost. What happens then is that the emulsion ‘splits’ reverting to a goo of egg & mustard with oil floating around on top. Messy!! )
5. Keep the string going and the emulsion will thicken and thicken until the mixer audibly begins to slow and you have what looks like unprocessed rubber around the blades. Add max. 1 table-spoon of vinegar. This will cause the gunge to ‘slacken’ somewhat, now add some water, say 1 tablespoon at a time, until the mix moves freely again. Then restart the string. Adjust the water/oil rate until you have ½ pint of the most delicious Mayo in the world.

NOTES

As in all cooking ‘what you put in, affects what you get out’. So, fiddle the ingredients to suit your taste. Use a particular oil, less salt, more sugar etc.,etc.

HARD COOKS VERSION – [Masochistic]

Ingredients as before.

1. Separate out the white from the yolk by cracking/halving the egg and pouring the yolk from half to half discarding the white.
2. In a dry mixing bowl put the yolk and dry ingredients and beat with a whisk until smooth and pale.
3. Add, and this is really tricky, oil drop by drop while whisking and whisking.
4. Weep as your hand and arm muscles spasm, but keep whisking.
5. Continue as above with the thickening/thinning process until you have the Mayo as before.
6. Resolve to use machine next time

Ingredients

• About 20  grapes, sliced into small chunks
• a good bunch of parsley, finely chopped
• a punch of toasted pin nuts
• olive oil
• good pinch of salt
• 1 “c” cup of cous cous

Add the cous cous, the grapes, half the parsley, the pine nuts and salt to a bowl. Add 2 seconds of olive oil (ensure bottle has a slow pour nozzle). Mix this together and cover with boiled water from a kettle. Then cover the bowl with cling film and leave to stand for 10-15 minutes. If unsure the water will have gone and the cous cous will have absorbed the lot…

Like I said in the beginning, this was an experiment, I think you could make this fruitier (I would though), maybe with apricots or similar.